Oh lookey there…a horse…a high horse…I think I’ll get on and take a ride…

What is the deal with folks and RSVP-ing?

Rather I should say:

What is the deal with folks and NOT RSVP-ing?

I mean is it really that hard to make a phone call these days?


Let me add here and now that this post is not for those wonderful folks who do RSVP. You can stop reading right now and move on to your favorite show. You’re golden and I love you.

Giddy-up…*clicks cheek*

I have children and a life. Therefore I have parties. Not as many as we used to, but still we have parties. Invitations go out in advance. Maybe not six weeks in advance, but early enough that folks have time to pick up the phone and give us a ring.

Is it not common courtesy any more to let people know that you are going to attend the soiree? Do folks not understand that if you don’t RSVP the host must then guestimate how many are attending and shop for an estimation? There is a difference between one case of soda versus needing four. Two bags of chips or more?

Ok those are not expensive examples, but some things can be pricey. Catered BBQ, yes I have done that and it was delicious, do you order for 20 or 40? The price jumps exponentially! (Order for 40, the left overs are worth it!)

The whole point of an invitation is to get a very close number of how many guests will be in attendance. Ever had a young kidlets birthday party with three extra surprise guests, plus the four invitees who did not RSVP but showed up anyway AND not enough goody bags to cover? Yeah, thats fun! Even making extra’s sometimes won’t cover it and who doesn’t love to end a party in tears? Right?

*oops I think I just dripped sarcasm on the bridle*

I even went so far one year because I was dumb NEEDED an exact number of guests-EXACT- and I put on the invitation the following words:

“If you do not call, email or speak directly to ME, the Mom, and tell me that your child is coming to the party, there will be a shortage of favors for your child. This year they are something special but I am only doing one per Yes RSVP. If you show up, not RSVP’d then your child will not receive any. Sorry to be a bear about this, but this year, it counts and I Need to know the exact number attending.”

I know, harsh words. Strange how it worked. I got RSVP’s.

Do I really have to do that every time?

Thankfully no. Now I keep the goody bags simple, easy and not so specifically special. Not quite as fun but sometimes easy is the way to go.

What if you’re RSVP-ing that you can’t come? Do you freak out that you can’t make it? Are you thinking it will hurt my feelings that you can’t come? Call anyway, I won’t die. You’ll be ok and it’s ok to say no. I don’t mind. It’s just a party, not the End All Be All. There will be other parties. It’s so much better to tell me you’re not coming so I don’t have to guess. It’s simple and I love simple. Please pick up the phone and just say I can’t make it.

Practice right now, say those words:

I can’t make it.

You don’t even have to be sorry, I don’t need sorry. I know you have a life and it does not revolve around me. I’m cool with that. Really I am. You’re totally cool that my life doesn’t revolve around you right? Right. See simple.

So come on folks, when you get that invite in the mail, the email, the FaceBook, just let us party planners know if you can come or can’t. We can take it. We are waiting for it. For your answer. No matter if it’s yay or neighnay, we love to know!

Whoa! This horse is done, time to go brush her down and stable her with some sweet oats. If you’ve ridden this far with me, thank you. I hope you won’t be saddle sore tomorrow.


About Sheila's Thinkerings

Happily married wife, happily mommied mom. I am far from perfect but I don't mind. Also I am a wee bit crazy, it's true. Just ask anyone who's ever met me...
This entry was posted in Blog 365, General. Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to RSVP…Not?

  1. Tanya says:


  2. Ruth Henry says:

    Well said, sista!!!

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